Making a Safety Plan
Having a personal safety plan is essential if you or your children are suffering abuse or living in a violent home.
This personal safety plan has been designed with safety in mind, whether you stay in the relationship or choose to leave.
In an emergency the most important single factor is the physical safety of yourself and any children you may have. These are some steps to follow but please remember that every woman’s situation is different, you may need to take all or only some of these steps and not necessarily in this order.
Safety During a Violent Incident
- If an argument seems unavoidable, try to have it in a room or area where you have access to an exit. Try to stay away from the bathroom, kitchen, bedroom or anywhere else where weapons might be available.
- Practice how to get out of your home safely. Identify which doors, windows, elevator or stairwell would be best.
- Have a bag packed ready and keep it at a relative’s or friend’s home in order to leave quickly.
- Identify one or more neighbours you can tell about the violence and ask that they call the police if they hear a disturbance coming from your home.
- Devise a codeword to use with your children, family, friends and neighbours when you need them to call the police.
- Decide and plan for where you will go if you have to leave home (even if you don’t think you will ever need to).
If You’ve Left Your Partner, But Are Still in Danger
- Change the locks, and put locks on the window.
- Ask the police for advice on making your home more secure.
- Tell the school who can pick up your children and who cannot.
- Report injuries to your GP so there is a record of the abuse.
- See a solicitor. They can help you with court orders to prevent your partner assaulting you, and make you aware of your legal rights.
If You’re Still Living with the Abuser
- Be ready to call 999 if you or your children are in danger.
- Keep some money and a set of keys in a safe place.
- Find out about your legal and housing rights. e.g. talk to a solicitor.
- Keep copies of important papers (passport, birth certificate, court order, marriage certificate) in a safe place.
- Carry a list of emergency numbers: police, relatives, friends, refuge.
- Tell someone you trust about the abuse.
- Make calls from a phone box or a friend’s house.
- Report any injuries to your GP so there is a record of the abuse.
- Talk to family and friends about staying with them in an emergency.
- Think about escape routes.
Looking after yourself is important. Do something you enjoy. Taking time to read a book, walk in the park or listen to some music help you feel more able to deal with what is happening. Above all, remember the abuse is not your fault.
Are You a Man Experiencing Abuse?
You may feel as if you’re the only man who has ever experienced domestic abuse – you are not alone. Although research shows that it is mainly women who experience domestic abuse, this doesn’t mean that men don’t suffer too.
At Rising Sun we aim to offer:
- Listening support on the phone; you can talk anonymously
- Advice on personal safety
- Help in accessing other services available including local councils, and other support services
- Signposting to Legal services (including solicitors who can help)
- Men have the same rights as women to be safe in their own homes and are protected exactly the same laws as women. All statutory services (such as the police, Criminal Prosecution Service, housing departments and social services) have a duty to provide services to all, whatever their gender
- If you are a man experiencing domestic abuse and you need emergency help you can call the police on 999